Whenever I’m working with trainers in training I am often asked the question around how to deal with difficult participants.  I must confess I struggle to answer questions on this, as it’s been a very long time since I had what I would consider a “difficult” participant.

I have had people who are tired, overworked, stressed, not well, questioning and skeptical.  None of which I code as “difficult”.  I believe when we go looking for difficult participants we find difficult participants. Equally, when we go looking for engaged, ready, curious and willing participants we will find them.

It’s a bit like bumblebees and blowflies.

Both of these creatures live on our planet, flying along looking for a place to land.  Blowflies are looking for rubbish and decomposing matter. Bumblebees are looking for flowers or the sweet stuff. As things currently stand, both will always find a place to land.

When it comes to walking into a room, whether you are training, leading a meeting, facilitating or a participant, what “lens” are you looking through? Are you looking for rubbish or sweet stuff?  In my experience, you can find whatever it is you are looking for.

I decided years ago that everyone in my training environment is a learner and it’s up to me to create the right environment for that.  It’s true that not everyone in my training environments really want to be there.  The only “categorising” I ever do with participants is to ask myself if they are:

Prisoners - really don’t want to be there, probably have “real work” to do and/or it’s compulsory or mandatory training and they are only there because they have to be.

Vacationers - see training as a “day off” and an opportunity for a change or something different. Generally just happy to be there.

Volunteers - are turning up because they really want to be in the room and have interest in the material or topic.I still assume they are all learners and if shown the way, will be willing to learn.

There are a number of strategies we can use to bring as many along for the ride as possible:

Flexibility - sometimes you need to go with the flow of where the group needs to go

Familiarity - how can you find common ground with the participants with shared experiences and universal stories

Focus - keep your attention “out” and focused on participants

Feedback - what signals are you getting that may require you to make a shift or take action

When you walk into the room what are you expecting to find?